Ichalvl

It's not the Fleshlight's fault, really. Just the fact that trying to use the one I ordered for my 34th birthday has rammed home the basic fact that I am a loser and that I am never going to get laid in my life.

I am apparently both too small and too big to use the Fleshlight. Small in the PENIS and big in the grossly overweight stomach. The result is that I apparently can't get very deep into the thing and experience the ribbing and other textures.

I ordered four inserts at once, three supertights with the three sorts of textures -- wave, ribbed, bumped -- and one ultratight. With all of them I have been having an incredible struggle to find a comfortable position to get in with my enormous stomach to allow for using the thing long enough to get off. I apparently developed a way to masturbate by hand that deluded myself into thinking I was normal. I am obviously not. I can only seem to go about an inch and a half into this Fleshlight before my fat gets in the way and the smallness of my PENIS defeat the purpose. The incredible depression of the experience makes it hard for me to stay erect as the whole time I am thinking about what a deformed, out-of-shape loser I am, so I end up only half hard or less.

Today is my 34th birthday. I have never had a girlfriend in my life, due to being a shy fatass with an ugly skin condition that I was afraid of having anyone see by taking my clothes off. I am so incredibly fucking lonely and depressed. I just want to be able to hug a woman, to hold her in my arms. Sex is frankly secondary to me, which is lucky given that I haven't had any except with my own hand.

I bought this thing thinking I would treat myself and make myself happier, but it has just driven home how fucked I am. I guess my only hope at this point is to find a woman who doesn't mind me only using oral sex on her because my PENIS obviously doesn't work very well.

It's not the Fleshlight's fault, really. Just the fact that trying to use the one I ordered for my 34th birthday has rammed home the basic fact that I am a loser and that I am never going to get laid in my life.

I am apparently both too small and too big to use the Fleshlight. Small in the PENIS and big in the grossly overweight stomach. The result is that I apparently can't get very deep into the thing and experience the ribbing and other textures.

I ordered four inserts at once, three supertights with the three sorts of textures -- wave, ribbed, bumped -- and one ultratight. With all of them I have been having an incredible struggle to find a comfortable position to get in with my enormous stomach to allow for using the thing long enough to get off. I apparently developed a way to masturbate by hand that deluded myself into thinking I was normal. I am obviously not. I can only seem to go about an inch and a half into this Fleshlight before my fat gets in the way and the smallness of my PENIS defeat the purpose. The incredible depression of the experience makes it hard for me to stay erect as the whole time I am thinking about what a deformed, out-of-shape loser I am, so I end up only half hard or less.

Today is my 34th birthday. I have never had a girlfriend in my life, due to being a shy fatass with an ugly skin condition that I was afraid of having anyone see by taking my clothes off. I am so incredibly fucking lonely and depressed. I just want to be able to hug a woman, to hold her in my arms. Sex is frankly secondary to me, which is lucky given that I haven't had any except with my own hand.

I bought this thing thinking I would treat myself and make myself happier, but it has just driven home how fucked I am. I guess my only hope at this point is to find a woman who doesn't mind me only using oral sex on her because my PENIS obviously doesn't work very well.

It's not the Fleshlight's fault, really. Just the fact that trying to use the one I ordered for my 34th birthday has rammed home the basic fact that I am a loser and that I am never going to get laid in my life.

I am apparently both too small and too big to use the Fleshlight. Small in the PENIS and big in the grossly overweight stomach. The result is that I apparently can't get very deep into the thing and experience the ribbing and other textures.

I ordered four inserts at once, three supertights with the three sorts of textures -- wave, ribbed, bumped -- and one ultratight. With all of them I have been having an incredible struggle to find a comfortable position to get in with my enormous stomach to allow for using the thing long enough to get off. I apparently developed a way to masturbate by hand that deluded myself into thinking I was normal. I am obviously not. I can only seem to go about an inch and a half into this Fleshlight before my fat gets in the way and the smallness of my PENIS defeat the purpose. The incredible depression of the experience makes it hard for me to stay erect as the whole time I am thinking about what a deformed, out-of-shape loser I am, so I end up only half hard or less.

Today is my 34th birthday. I have never had a girlfriend in my life, due to being a shy fatass with an ugly skin condition that I was afraid of having anyone see by taking my clothes off. I am so incredibly fucking lonely and depressed. I just want to be able to hug a woman, to hold her in my arms. Sex is frankly secondary to me, which is lucky given that I haven't had any except with my own hand.

I bought this thing thinking I would treat myself and make myself happier, but it has just driven home how fucked I am. I guess my only hope at this point is to find a woman who doesn't mind me only using oral sex on her because my PENIS obviously doesn't work very well.

Alright.
 
We all know DogsGoMeow.
 
We all know that he loves nothing more than infracting people.
 
We all know that people still shitpost in Complaint Department threads.
 
We all know that this bugs staff because it's harder to sift through evidence.
 
We all know that 90% of the time the person making the thread has fucked something up.
 
So..
 
Here's my amazing idea.
 
Whenever a Complaint Department thread is made..
 
Another thread is made in the CD "Discussion" subforum..
 
This thread wouldn't be shown in the "Recent Threads" box..
 
This thread would be used as an area to discuss the submitted complaint..
 
Now.
 
Here's why it's a good idea.
 
- Someone fucked something up in the official CD thread. You don't feel like getting infracted for trying to help. You post it in the discussion thread, and bam, you're fine.
 
- You think that the original poster has a really good argument and you want to point out a possibly overlooked detail.
 
- You feel the need to voice your opinion about the submitted complaint (of course, because this is sG, you'd only have good things to say), but you aren't directly part of it and you don't want to get infracted.
 
- It's overall a good way for more of a fair "community" opinion to rise alongside the Staff opinion. Now, this community opinion might be meaningless in some cases, but in other cases, it might prove to be more useful than the staff's vote.
 
Now, of course, this thread would still have rules - much stricter than Spam or Pub threads.
 
These threads would require..
- Relevant Discussion.
- ACTUAL discussion (Not posting some reaction picture that says "u mad bro").
- Meaningful discussion (no saying you're a faggot because you don't like the op).
 
I feel that this addition to the forums would really clean up Complaint Department threads, as well as spark more discussion among the community. 
 
Think of the discussion thread to be a "Jury", of sorts. But, the "jury" is not directly correlated with the final decision.
 
I hope staff consider this idea.
 
Thanks for your time.
 

i-f
y-o-u
s-e-e
t-h-i-s
j-o-i-n
t-s

It's not the Fleshlight's fault, really. Just the fact that trying to use the one I ordered for my 34th birthday has rammed home the basic fact that I am a loser and that I am never going to get laid in my life.

I am apparently both too small and too big to use the Fleshlight. Small in the PENIS and big in the grossly overweight stomach. The result is that I apparently can't get very deep into the thing and experience the ribbing and other textures.

I ordered four inserts at once, three supertights with the three sorts of textures -- wave, ribbed, bumped -- and one ultratight. With all of them I have been having an incredible struggle to find a comfortable position to get in with my enormous stomach to allow for using the thing long enough to get off. I apparently developed a way to masturbate by hand that deluded myself into thinking I was normal. I am obviously not. I can only seem to go about an inch and a half into this Fleshlight before my fat gets in the way and the smallness of my PENIS defeat the purpose. The incredible depression of the experience makes it hard for me to stay erect as the whole time I am thinking about what a deformed, out-of-shape loser I am, so I end up only half hard or less.

Today is my 34th birthday. I have never had a girlfriend in my life, due to being a shy fatass with an ugly skin condition that I was afraid of having anyone see by taking my clothes off. I am so incredibly fucking lonely and depressed. I just want to be able to hug a woman, to hold her in my arms. Sex is frankly secondary to me, which is lucky given that I haven't had any except with my own hand.

I bought this thing thinking I would treat myself and make myself happier, but it has just driven home how fucked I am. I guess my only hope at this point is to find a woman who doesn't mind me only using oral sex on her because my PENIS obviously doesn't work very well.

Alright.
 
We all know DogsGoMeow.
 
We all know that he loves nothing more than infracting people.
 
We all know that people still shitpost in Complaint Department threads.
 
We all know that this bugs staff because it's harder to sift through evidence.
 
We all know that 90% of the time the person making the thread has fucked something up.
 
So..
 
Here's my amazing idea.
 
Whenever a Complaint Department thread is made..
 
Another thread is made in the CD "Discussion" subforum..
 
This thread wouldn't be shown in the "Recent Threads" box..
 
This thread would be used as an area to discuss the submitted complaint..
 
Now.
 
Here's why it's a good idea.
 
- Someone fucked something up in the official CD thread. You don't feel like getting infracted for trying to help. You post it in the discussion thread, and bam, you're fine.
 
- You think that the original poster has a really good argument and you want to point out a possibly overlooked detail.
 
- You feel the need to voice your opinion about the submitted complaint (of course, because this is sG, you'd only have good things to say), but you aren't directly part of it and you don't want to get infracted.
 
- It's overall a good way for more of a fair "community" opinion to rise alongside the Staff opinion. Now, this community opinion might be meaningless in some cases, but in other cases, it might prove to be more useful than the staff's vote.
 
Now, of course, this thread would still have rules - much stricter than Spam or Pub threads.
 
These threads would require..
- Relevant Discussion.
- ACTUAL discussion (Not posting some reaction picture that says "u mad bro").
- Meaningful discussion (no saying you're a faggot because you don't like the op).
 
I feel that this addition to the forums would really clean up Complaint Department threads, as well as spark more discussion among the community. 
 
Think of the discussion thread to be a "Jury", of sorts. But, the "jury" is not directly correlated with the final decision.
 
I hope staff consider this idea.
 
Thanks for your time.
 

Alright.
 
We all know DogsGoMeow.
 
We all know that he loves nothing more than infracting people.
 
We all know that people still shitpost in Complaint Department threads.
 
We all know that this bugs staff because it's harder to sift through evidence.
 
We all know that 90% of the time the person making the thread has fucked something up.
 
So..
 
Here's my amazing idea.
 
Whenever a Complaint Department thread is made..
 
Another thread is made in the CD "Discussion" subforum..
 
This thread wouldn't be shown in the "Recent Threads" box..
 
This thread would be used as an area to discuss the submitted complaint..
 
Now.
 
Here's why it's a good idea.
 
- Someone fucked something up in the official CD thread. You don't feel like getting infracted for trying to help. You post it in the discussion thread, and bam, you're fine.
 
- You think that the original poster has a really good argument and you want to point out a possibly overlooked detail.
 
- You feel the need to voice your opinion about the submitted complaint (of course, because this is sG, you'd only have good things to say), but you aren't directly part of it and you don't want to get infracted.
 
- It's overall a good way for more of a fair "community" opinion to rise alongside the Staff opinion. Now, this community opinion might be meaningless in some cases, but in other cases, it might prove to be more useful than the staff's vote.
 
Now, of course, this thread would still have rules - much stricter than Spam or Pub threads.
 
These threads would require..
- Relevant Discussion.
- ACTUAL discussion (Not posting some reaction picture that says "u mad bro").
- Meaningful discussion (no saying you're a faggot because you don't like the op).
 
I feel that this addition to the forums would really clean up Complaint Department threads, as well as spark more discussion among the community. 
 
Think of the discussion thread to be a "Jury", of sorts. But, the "jury" is not directly correlated with the final decision.
 
I hope staff consider this idea.
 
Thanks for your time.
 

Alright.
 
We all know DogsGoMeow.
 
We all know that he loves nothing more than infracting people.
 
We all know that people still shitpost in Complaint Department threads.
 
We all know that this bugs staff because it's harder to sift through evidence.
 
We all know that 90% of the time the person making the thread has fucked something up.
 
So..
 
Here's my amazing idea.
 
Whenever a Complaint Department thread is made..
 
Another thread is made in the CD "Discussion" subforum..
 
This thread wouldn't be shown in the "Recent Threads" box..
 
This thread would be used as an area to discuss the submitted complaint..
 
Now.
 
Here's why it's a good idea.
 
- Someone fucked something up in the official CD thread. You don't feel like getting infracted for trying to help. You post it in the discussion thread, and bam, you're fine.
 
- You think that the original poster has a really good argument and you want to point out a possibly overlooked detail.
 
- You feel the need to voice your opinion about the submitted complaint (of course, because this is sG, you'd only have good things to say), but you aren't directly part of it and you don't want to get infracted.
 
- It's overall a good way for more of a fair "community" opinion to rise alongside the Staff opinion. Now, this community opinion might be meaningless in some cases, but in other cases, it might prove to be more useful than the staff's vote.
 
Now, of course, this thread would still have rules - much stricter than Spam or Pub threads.
 
These threads would require..
- Relevant Discussion.
- ACTUAL discussion (Not posting some reaction picture that says "u mad bro").
- Meaningful discussion (no saying you're a faggot because you don't like the op).
 
I feel that this addition to the forums would really clean up Complaint Department threads, as well as spark more discussion among the community. 
 
Think of the discussion thread to be a "Jury", of sorts. But, the "jury" is not directly correlated with the final decision.
 
I hope staff consider this idea.
 
Thanks for your time.
 

Alright.
 
We all know DogsGoMeow.
 
We all know that he loves nothing more than infracting people.
 
We all know that people still shitpost in Complaint Department threads.
 
We all know that this bugs staff because it's harder to sift through evidence.
 
We all know that 90% of the time the person making the thread has fucked something up.
 
So..
 
Here's my amazing idea.
 
Whenever a Complaint Department thread is made..
 
Another thread is made in the CD "Discussion" subforum..
 
This thread wouldn't be shown in the "Recent Threads" box..
 
This thread would be used as an area to discuss the submitted complaint..
 
Now.
 
Here's why it's a good idea.
 
- Someone fucked something up in the official CD thread. You don't feel like getting infracted for trying to help. You post it in the discussion thread, and bam, you're fine.
 
- You think that the original poster has a really good argument and you want to point out a possibly overlooked detail.
 
- You feel the need to voice your opinion about the submitted complaint (of course, because this is sG, you'd only have good things to say), but you aren't directly part of it and you don't want to get infracted.
 
- It's overall a good way for more of a fair "community" opinion to rise alongside the Staff opinion. Now, this community opinion might be meaningless in some cases, but in other cases, it might prove to be more useful than the staff's vote.
 
Now, of course, this thread would still have rules - much stricter than Spam or Pub threads.
 
These threads would require..
- Relevant Discussion.
- ACTUAL discussion (Not posting some reaction picture that says "u mad bro").
- Meaningful discussion (no saying you're a faggot because you don't like the op).
 
I feel that this addition to the forums would really clean up Complaint Department threads, as well as spark more discussion among the community. 
 
Think of the discussion thread to be a "Jury", of sorts. But, the "jury" is not directly correlated with the final decision.
 
I hope staff consider this idea.
 
Thanks for your time.
 

Alright.
 
We all know DogsGoMeow.
 
We all know that he loves nothing more than infracting people.
 
We all know that people still shitpost in Complaint Department threads.
 
We all know that this bugs staff because it's harder to sift through evidence.
 
We all know that 90% of the time the person making the thread has fucked something up.
 
So..
 
Here's my amazing idea.
 
Whenever a Complaint Department thread is made..
 
Another thread is made in the CD "Discussion" subforum..
 
This thread wouldn't be shown in the "Recent Threads" box..
 
This thread would be used as an area to discuss the submitted complaint..
 
Now.
 
Here's why it's a good idea.
 
- Someone fucked something up in the official CD thread. You don't feel like getting infracted for trying to help. You post it in the discussion thread, and bam, you're fine.
 
- You think that the original poster has a really good argument and you want to point out a possibly overlooked detail.
 
- You feel the need to voice your opinion about the submitted complaint (of course, because this is sG, you'd only have good things to say), but you aren't directly part of it and you don't want to get infracted.
 
- It's overall a good way for more of a fair "community" opinion to rise alongside the Staff opinion. Now, this community opinion might be meaningless in some cases, but in other cases, it might prove to be more useful than the staff's vote.
 
Now, of course, this thread would still have rules - much stricter than Spam or Pub threads.
 
These threads would require..
- Relevant Discussion.
- ACTUAL discussion (Not posting some reaction picture that says "u mad bro").
- Meaningful discussion (no saying you're a faggot because you don't like the op).
 
I feel that this addition to the forums would really clean up Complaint Department threads, as well as spark more discussion among the community. 
 
Think of the discussion thread to be a "Jury", of sorts. But, the "jury" is not directly correlated with the final decision.
 
I hope staff consider this idea.
 
Thanks for your time.
 

oh god that's right
 
Sweetrock said it herself
 
She has an artistic child

your mom did actually.

oh god that's right
 
Sweetrock said it herself
 
She has an artistic child

holy fuck
 
no wonder you aim was so shaky in comp
 
your mouse is the source of all the failure

holy fuck
 
no wonder you aim was so shaky in comp
 
your mouse is the source of all the failure

holy fuck
 
no wonder you aim was so shaky in comp
 
your mouse is the source of all the failure

holy fuck
 
no wonder you aim was so shaky in comp
 
your mouse is the source of all the failure

holy fuck
 
no wonder you aim was so shaky in comp
 
your mouse is the source of all the failure

wait, people still have sigs activated? I globally disabled them because my pages were being bogged down by all of the damn gifs.

So
Basically
A Csgo tournament

welcome to the forums
 
they'll stay muted
 
because everyone on jb is fucking retarded
 
and having terrorists mic spam is just another thing that admins would have to deal with

mmmm
 
sweer potatoes

mmmm
 
sweer potatoes