Depression

[Formerly known as Karma 0]

Oh really? 'Cause that's all I was doing, chief. No need to get all uppity.

You make it seem like depression is just some small issue that has an easy fix.

[Guest Horny©at]

When I was going through a time of depression, I smoked weed whenever I was feeling down. A half hour later, Im totally happy. Not really a long-term fix (I made it in to one), but works well.

I hope you know smoking weed doesn't get rid of depression, it just HIDES it for about 2-3 hours. People smoke weed to get away from the world and take a step back from reality, but that's just it. After that you are still depressed, back to stage 1.

[Dojima 7619]

You make it seem like depression is just some small issue that has an easy fix.

By depression I'm assuming that he's just down in the dumps, as that's what he said, and not truly in a state of depression in the clinical sense or MDD as Chosen put it. So...yeah.

[WaaX 6]

I was trying to stay out of the convo to see how this was gonna turn out. However its time for me to jump in.

Depression = mood AND affect

From what I've read the duration hasn't met the criteria for MDD. I don't know your age but I'm assuming you're a teen.....ish person. So if you feel your break up has caused you to have thoughts of hurting yourself then tell your parents. Other than that maintain open lines of commo w/ your ex.

25, and I have at times considered it to be painfully honest. It's odd though, I'm way more down than I was during those times and the thought really hasn't crossed my mind for consideration.

The thing is, she doesn't want to talk to me, she thinks it's better for me for her to just completely leave my life. I also believe that it would be more painful to talk to her while she's with this guy than to not talk to her at all.

Weed helped me last night, but I don't have the money for it. There is a full bottle of 20mg prozacs in my kitchen, I'm going to start taking one daily.. I know that it takes up to a month to work, but it's worth it. I understand self medication is an extremely bad thing to do, but I just don't have the resources to get medication the legit way.

[Formerly known as Karma 0]

By depression I'm assuming that he's just down in the dumps, as that's what he said, and not truly in a state of depression in the clinical sense or MDD as Chosen put it. So...yeah.

Sorry. Depression is a sore topic for me. I thought maybe he was actually talking about depression and not just... i dunno, being "down in the dumps."

[UnknownLegend 5480]

Have you ever dealt with depression? Or known anyone who has? Because it sounds like you're talking out of your ass. Like you're assuming you know anything about it but, in reality, you don't.

Let's be clear-- Chosen is right, not to belittle his situation, but it doesn't sound like he has Major Depression, it sounds like he's depressed. This sounds to be the first episode he's had, he's not letting us know anything aside from the fact that he was "destroyed" by his breakup-- let's assume that means despair, loss of interest in doing things he enjoyed, and the inability to concentrate on things. It's situational, but eventually he will be able to move on. The things some people are suggesting will still help him, too, even if it's not chronic. Probably the most key thing for him right now is establishing a support system-- even though it might not be recurring MDD, the mindfulness stuff and the learned optimism could still benefit him too.

tl;dr -- it's a temporary slump-- it sucks, but it's not as life shattering as some people are reading.

@ WaaX -- Talk to friends about the break-up, maybe go smoke weed with them, but don't use it as a crutch like some people said-- have fun with it. If you can bear it, and if she's not totally cutting you off, eventually try to reconcile with your ex and get some closure. Exercise, distract yourself, and read the books if you feel so inclined, but you probably don't need them (or professional help) unless you start having recurring episodes, or unless self-injurious behavior or thoughts become a problem.

St Johns Wort looks promising, if you're looking for some cheap anti-depressants and don't have tons of money.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/St_John%27s_wort

Yeah. Or not. Even "real" anti-depressants are only slightly more effective than a placebo with patients with severe Major Depression; anti-depressants are not something he needs right now.

[ChosenOne2000 4440]

25, and I have at times considered it to be painfully honest. It's odd though, I'm way more down than I was during those times and the thought really hasn't crossed my mind for consideration.

The thing is, she doesn't want to talk to me, she thinks it's better for me for her to just completely leave my life. I also believe that it would be more painful to talk to her while she's with this guy than to not talk to her at all.

Weed helped me last night, but I don't have the money for it. There is a full bottle of 20mg prozacs in my kitchen, I'm going to start taking one daily.. I know that it takes up to a month to work, but it's worth it. I understand self medication is an extremely bad thing to do, but I just don't have the resources to get medication the legit way.

Do you currently feel that you want to hurt yourself or someone else?

[Formerly known as Karma 0]

tl;dr -- it's a temporary slump-- it sucks, but it's not as life shattering as some people are reading.

Yea, I guess I took the thread title too seriously. As a person who does deal with it in the clinical sense, when I see the word, I usually think someone does mean it in the serious sense. Not just being upset or down in the dumps about something. But yes, some good points.

[UnknownLegend 5480]

25, and I have at times considered it to be painfully honest. It's odd though, I'm way more down than I was during those times and the thought really hasn't crossed my mind for consideration.

The thing is, she doesn't want to talk to me, she thinks it's better for me for her to just completely leave my life. I also believe that it would be more painful to talk to her while she's with this guy than to not talk to her at all.

Weed helped me last night, but I don't have the money for it. There is a full bottle of 20mg prozacs in my kitchen, I'm going to start taking one daily.. I know that it takes up to a month to work, but it's worth it. I understand self medication is an extremely bad thing to do, but I just don't have the resources to get medication the legit way.

Well, this post changes things a bit.

Don't take the Prozac-- a side effect of anti-depressants that can occur is actually increased suicidal thoughts for the first 2-3 weeks, and don't reach full efficacy until about 6 weeks after taking them. You don't have enough to get them to work they way they should, and on top of that, you shouldn't be taking them without establishing a person to support you first-- a friend you can confide in, a parent, something.

If all else fails, call a crisis hotline if you're feeling suicidal-- they have volunteer counselors who will talk with you over the phone. It's someone you don't know, but who will listen to your thoughts and try to help you through as much as you can-- they're also free. If you want, I can try and get you a number. PM me if you want it.

If all else fails, call 911 and check yourself into the hospital. No matter how shitty you think your life is, it's not worth killing yourself over.

[Psycho 0]

Asides from seeking trained professional help, what are some of the ways you people cope with depression? What do you do to get your mind off shit when you're really fucking down.. I'm going through some serious shit right now with an ex girlfriend and I'm pretty destroyed over it, I can't seem to find anything to cheer me up.

I took pills after seeing a doctor because I wanted to commit suicicide.

Worked well, and my depression runs in the family. There's an inbalance of chemicals gene that runs through my father's side.

He tried to kill himself when he was 20ish, my brother tried to kill himself when he was 16-sh, and I felt like killing myself when I was 12-ish. Each of us are doing fine now. My father had family get through his while my brother took the same medicine I take now.

Don't underestimate drugs. They can be helpful in a cautious environment.

[Guest Fohacidal]

How the shit do you reach a point of suicide at 12? Im pretty sure the youngest Iv ever heard was 14

[UnknownLegend 5480]

How the shit do you reach a point of suicide at 12? Im pretty sure the youngest Iv ever heard was 14

Suicide is being reported much younger these days. Social expectations, etc.

[WaaX 6]

Don't take the Prozac-- a side effect of anti-depressants that can occur is actually increased suicidal thoughts for the first 2-3 weeks, and don't reach full efficacy until about 6 weeks after taking them.

Well, since this is a pretty serious conversation, I'll explain myself in more detail. I have always fought with depression, ever since I was a little kid and my parents divorced (they use to pawn me back and forth against each other for their own malicious gain). The first love of my life (I was 16) left me for my best friend because he was two years older and slightly more attractive. Another girl who I dated for a year and a half cheated on me for a very long time until I installed a key logger on my own pc to see what she was trying to hide from me (she would close aim windows everytime I would get up and get near the computer, got me suspicious). I was depressed back then, but it was only because of women, so it wasn't out of control and hard to handle.

The hardest point of my life when it came to dealing with depression was when I was living in Florida (when I found these servers actually). My whole life had fallen apart, I lost my girlfriend, my car, my job, my mom and I were struggling with rent.. we were about to be homeless. Things were very very bad for me at that time, and that was scariest moment I've had to go through in regards to considering suicide. Since I lost my car (seized the engine, long story), I couldn't go see my friends (lived 30'ish miles away) so I was stuck at an apartment with my computer and two dogs (I love the fuck out of those dogs, I miss them). That was when I found sG, I played a lot during that time, it was perfect for getting my mind off shit.

I eventually sold a few things on craigslist and got enough money for a greyhound ticket back to Michigan (where I lived before moving to Florida).. and I came back into the same exact thing I had tried to run away from. I'm living with my dad again, he's still an incredibly bad alcoholic (for instance its 1:39am and he's in the living room screaming at himself). I was much more ahead in life before I moved to Florida than I am now (after moving back).

I had Chelsea though, we met before I moved to Florida at a haunted house that I worked at. We didn't really talk that much then one day when I was pretty down I saw her on aim and decided to strike up a conversation. A month later her and I were dating even though I lived in Florida and she was in Michigan, part of the reason for me moving back was because of her. She was there for me during that transition, if I didn't have her then I probably would have been as depressed as I am now. She gave me something to smile about, something to be happy for. Now, she's gone, and my life is that much more miserable.

I'm looking forward to Monday though, I have to call a guy back.. I may be getting a job at Valvoline changing oil, I would be very happy and fortunate for that job.

I had explained (for the most part) what had happened between Chelsea and I to a friend. I saved the log.. you can read it at http://blastedbeats.com/thatshow.txt if you're interested.

I would check myself into the hospital if I consider hurting myself, but I haven't gotten to that point yet, and I probably wont.

I sincerely appreciate each and every one of you providing your input for me. Thank you

[Guest Fohacidal]

A lot of people in life go through it with a big mirror hanging in front of wherever they go. So no matter how they try to look at their future all they see is the crap they left behind. You need to learn how to get past that mirror yourself so your future wont be made by your own past, you need to move on.

[Howard Dean 2502]

I think cape fear sums up what fohacidal is saying.

till, things won't ever be the

way they were before he came.

But that's all right

Because if you

hang on to the past,

you die a little every day.

And for myself,

I know I'd rather live.

[Formerly known as Karma 0]

A lot of people in life go through it with a big mirror hanging in front of wherever they go. So no matter how they try to look at their future all they see is the crap they left behind. You need to learn how to get past that mirror yourself so your future wont be made by your own past, you need to move on.

Without professional help though, that can be a very hard thing to try and do. But I completely agree.

[Longcat 126]

Jerk it and play some puzzle games. Plants Vs Zombies or Bloons TD. Something that keeps you on your toes.

[Noire 17]

Take up a sport. If you can, play something like tennis or basketball. Something that gets you out of the house, with other people.

I know people play basketball at the park where I used to live, so just look for a park where people play and I'm sure they will have no problem letting you join in. Plus you get to meet new ppl and make new friends.

Don't smoke pot to "cure" your depression, because it won't.

Try to plan what you want to do to make your life better with a list of goals to accomplish this. Then work on those goals.

It will help distract you long enough to where you might start to enjoy life agian.

Listening to your favorite songs helps too.

Also Yoga is a good way to relax your mind and body. If you don't want to pay for it, you can use this. I record his shows on my dvr and would play them when I wanted to do yoga. Plus he has a lot of classes and they are really good for beginners.

http://www.veria.com/yoga-for-life.html

[Malic343 0]

I had explained (for the most part) what had happened between Chelsea and I to a friend. I saved the log.. you can read it at http://blastedbeats.com/thatshow.txt if you're interested.

Just got caught up. First WaaX, what most people have said will be helpful. Junz and a few others. Stay away from weed and most other medications cause its a temporary fix, unless you need a couple of hours to cool down i wouldnt use em. As for long term meds, i wouldnt get into them unless you feel you struggle with long term depression.

Im going to be pretty forward here.

Other people have said things that have helped them...like yelling at the mirror for hours. For their (most likely aggro) personality this probably helped. But it doesnt seem like youve the same personality as them, if punching the wall doesnt help you than screaming at a mirror probably wont help either.

Others have said to find closure, this is great advice...but youve said she doesnt want any contact. That is something you will probably have to respect otherwise her anger will probably get worse and the pain will probably increase as she says things she probably doesnt mean.

I cant say any of us have been in exactly the same place, but i think most of us have dealt with some major depression at some time or another, especially at the loss of a loved one...and at this point, this is a loss of a loved one, because suddenly contact is lost. You may have to treat this as a death til you feel strong enough to handle it differently. Finding closure in a death is easier than finding closure in a relationship where a crazy bitch (speaking from a personal past experience) doesnt want to communicate.

Someone said get out of the house and hang out with your bro's. This is excellent advice. Even if you dont do anything...Ive found a lot of solace from the silent support of a nearby friend.

Keeping busy with some kind of work or hobby is also good advice. Doing anything you take pride in will help.

Getting rid of EVERYTHING that reminds you of her. This means pictures in your wallet, stuffed bears on your shelf and the occasional sweater. This will be extremely hard but for the long run, it is so necessary.

Personally, this seems like an end to a not so good relationship, based on the link you put up. I think you miss who you thought she was. Maybe for a little while you felt she gave you something to look forward to, an identity of sorts, but she doesnt seem to be a good person and she isnt who you imagined. To put it lightly shes not it. AND trust me, another will come but for now, piece together your life. Work on your future (career, accomplishments, knowledge, spirituality, etc.) without anyone else in the picture, building up your own identity is key.

Off topic, if shes joining the AF, its probably for the best that its broken off now. Because if shes being moved to CA, (before her tech school but after her basic training) she is probably going to DLI (Defense Language Institute) in Monterey, unless shes going to a really short school in CA. Odds are shell be going from MI to Basic (TX near 0 contact for 6-8 weeks) to her tech school (CA). Depending on the language she is forced to study she will be there anywhere from 8 weeks (spanish) to 1-2ish years (chinese/farsi). From there she will be moved back to Texas for 4-6 months...and then from there she willl probably be shipped to a base that teaches her basic survival (SERE) and how to overcome torture methods, somewhere in Washington. (It sounds cool, but its not pleasant and only true aircrew have to do this. During this time 0 contact. A couple of weeks if i remember correctly) From their they will ship her out to a temp station, probably Nebraska for 6 months...and finally to her new station...which will most likely be anywhere outside of the US (again depends on her language). Because she was trained at DLI shell be a linguist. Linguists jobs are hard and theyre a very secluded and guarded bunch because of "top secret" reasons. Loneliness + availability + no want of a commitment = non relationship material. They also go on airborne missions all of the time. You wont be seeing her that often...after atleast 3 moves, no time together, pressure from work/military plus deployments for months at a time...Well, like i said its for the best because the next 2 years (at the least) will be extremely stressful on her and anyone else involved. Unless she has a solid friendship with this Zak character...than this Zak guy doesnt stand a chance, trust me. Better him than you.

On topic, if you need professional help (but cant afford any) Junz said there are hotlines. This helps, but i myself need to talk to someones face. Most big cities have free clinics, you just have to know how to find them. If you need help finding them PM me and ill start looking for some in your area.

If your friends arent available or arent hitting the spot, i do know that for the most part pastors in a good locally known church have some kind of counseling degree OR can hook you up with someone that does. If its a good church they will deal with you as a person...and hopefully, not as a soon to be convert. Plus they dont charge. Also, you can get help at a local highschool. Their counselors normally, want the best for people. If they see that youre in some real need they will probably talk to you for an hour or so or get you into contact with someone that can.

[Guest Fohacidal]

Without professional help though, that can be a very hard thing to try and do. But I completely agree.

Sometimes self discovery is the most rewarding. It just taking the first step to accepting a new life thats the hardest because you keep falling back.

[adam :) 12]

Ive been through depression for 3 years. When I was about 14 my uncle passed away, Since my dad was always out due to my parents divorce he was the only one who felt like a dad to me, For 3 years I was depressed. The things that will help you most is to avoid everything that will remind you of your ex girlfreind it may be hard but it's the best thing for you. The way I overcome it was from joining the army as soon as I turned 17, It's different for me since ive always wanted to be in the army, But honestly do something you would love to do, Stay away from drinks for a bit because trust me, You may think when your drunk you will forget about everything thats happened but you wont. It's gonna be hard to get over this stuff that has happened to you, But just don't forget about taking care of yourself. Right now all you need is yourself & your family to help you get through it.

Most of all get out there and have fun, If your old enough and have enough money go for a small holiday, Or if you're still young just go for a walk in the city or something, Thinking about the past leaves scars for your future, Forget it. Get over it and be happy.

Trust me at the end of all this you will find someone else. The other things I done to get it off my mind was staying away from home, When your home you think to much, Try to get out and about and have some fun with you're mates.

Hope you get through it soon man, I feel sorry for you since ive been through a somewhat same situation. Good luck

[TURKISH RAMBO 9]

You should get a dog.

sometimes i feel he is my only reason to keep going.

No matter what happens he always seems to take my mind off things and put a smile on my face

Hes my best friend/brother/son, ad nothin will change that.

I dont know how im going to handle losing him when it comes to that time. My friend cryed more for his dog passing than his grandma.

[Formerly known as Karma 0]

Sometimes self discovery is the most rewarding. It just taking the first step to accepting a new life thats the hardest because you keep falling back.

Wow Foh, I didn't realize you were so smart.

[Clay 24]

This thread is too long and I don't care to read it all, right now at least.

I'm an indecisive, lazy, depressed, suicidal kid who is stuck on someone who is also depressed and suicidal that he doesn't have a chance with.

When I'm feeling really down about my shit situation, I just smoke a bowl and listen to mellow music. Or I play Condemned. Game's brutal as shit.

[Sharkmage 0]

I'm an indecisive, lazy, depressed, suicidal kid who is stuck on someone who is also depressed and suicidal that he doesn't have a chance with.

The vast majority of healthy people have occasional thoughts of suicide.

And depressed/suicidal chicks are usually also narcissistic, borderline, or otherwise crazy as fuck and not worth it. Sayin' from experience.